Escaping Our Emotional Bunkers

Jan 9
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Our lives are perpetually, in some form or fashion, in a state of constant conversation—if not with others, with ourselves. A “good” conversation has the power to produce a smile, to lift our spirits, and to bring great joy. Some might say that the quality of our life is, in many ways, shaped by the tone and the tenor of our conversations.

Unfortunately, many of us spend far too much time trapped in situations and conversations that are unproductive, unhealthy, and undesirable. When this repeatedly happens over an extended period, it's natural for us to seek refuge in what I refer to as an emotional bunker—that place where we can find shelter and relief from these undesirable situations, and the people and the conversations that come with them.

After more than 20 years of serving leaders and organizations in the public and private sectors, I've encountered thousands of people who confess to me that they are in an emotional bunker. Many express a desire to escape their bunker, but they don't know how and they don't have the tools. As a result, they abandon their dreams, they become disconnected from their organizations, and they do just enough to get by—barely.

I’ve noticed this cycle is so prevalent and so pervasive that it can paralyze even the most experienced leaders with some of the most robust skillsets. I must admit it is depressing to witness good people get swallowed up by situations in life that are unnecessary and uneven. Beyond the damage to the individual, emotional bunkers seem to release a toxin in the surrounding environment that can affect others. In fact, when our most talented people escape into their private emotional bunkers it further compromises the quality of the conversations that still exist. All of this weakens the possibility of collective action, and it is precisely collective action that is needed if we have any hope of solving some of the most difficult challenges our communities and organizations—even, our nation and world—face today.

This is why I am even more committed than ever before to collective action as the highest and purest form of strategy ever crafted by human beings. So, this series is dedicated to symphonic strategies™ that entice people out of their emotional bunkers and prevent them from dropping down into them in the first place.

I believe that everyone deserves to be able to pursue their full potential. That journey begins with having access to practical strategies that minimize the discordant notes that distract us from focusing on the pursuit of something extraordinary in our lives, on our teams, and within our communities. At its core, it is a journey anchored by practical guides and tools that create the space we need to be able to spend more time on the conversations that elevate.

Alonford J. Robinson Jr., Ph.D.

Symphonic Strategies, Inc.

About the author:
Dr. A.J. Robinson is the founder and CEO of Symphonic Strategies, a firm that specializes in collective action, leadership development, and systems change. He’s a strategist, teacher, and activist for policies and practices that elevate. Sympact is a platform developed and operated by Symphonic Strategies. 

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Post by: Symphonic Strategies

“It seems to me that I’ve often been in places where if you wanted to make life better for yourself, you had to work to make life better for everybody.”
--Dr. June Jackson Christmas
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Not everyone knows Dr. June Jackson Christmas’s name, but fellow leaders in her field are fully aware of how her contributions made other peoples’ lives better. Dr. Christmas, who passed away on New Year’s Eve at age 99, was a pioneering Black woman psychiatrist and one of the first scholars and practitioners to address the impact of social and economic factors on mental health


She made history early in life as one of the first three students who identified as Black to graduate from Vassar College, where she was in the class of 1945-4. (The few Black students who attended Vassar years earlier had kept their racial identities hidden and “passed” as white while on campus.) After college, like her fellow trailblazing Black classmate Beatrix McCleary Hamburg, Dr. Christmas chose to go to medical school to study psychiatry. Dr. Hamburg became the first Black woman graduate of the Yale School of Medicine and an expert in child psychiatry. Dr. Christmas, who was one of just seven women in her class at Boston University’s School of Medicine, said she originally hoped studying psychiatry might help her teach people not to be racist. It did help her address race and class as she fought to make sure vulnerable populations had better access to care.


Dr. Christmas was a clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University’s College of Physicians and Surgeons, a professor of behavioral science at the City University of New York School of Medicine, a resident professor of mental health policy at the Heller Graduate School of Social Welfare of Brandeis University, the first Black woman president of the American Public Health Association, and an appointed leader who shaped New York City’s mental health care policy. As the New York Times said, Dr. Christmas “broke barriers as a Black woman by heading New York City’s Department of Mental Health and Retardation Services under three mayors . . . As a city commissioner, as chief of rehabilitation services at Harlem Hospital Center, and in her role overseeing the transition of the U.S. Department of Health, Education and Welfare to a Democratic administration for President-elect Jimmy Carter, Dr. Christmas ardently advanced her professional agenda.” 


The Times continued: “Her priorities included improving mental health services for older people, helping people cope with alcoholism, and assisting children ensnared in the bureaucracies of foster care and the legal system. She also sought to ease the transition of patients from being warehoused in state mental hospitals to living independently . . . In 1964 she founded Harlem Rehabilitation Center, a Harlem Hospital program, which gained a national reputation for providing vocational training and psychiatric help to psychiatric hospital patients who had returned to their communities after being discharged.” This became a model for patient care. 


All of this gives a sense of not just what made Dr. Christmas a trailblazing leader, but how she displayed the characteristics of a symphonic leader. Throughout her life she was used to seeing the impossible: possessing a mindset that is free from the constraints imposed by the current reality, even a 13-year-old growing up in Boston who organized a spontaneous sit-in to try to integrate a roller-skating rink in neighboring Cambridge. She brought that mindset to each new role where she seized the opportunity to make advances in patient care. When asked in an interview how she motivated people, Dr. Christmas answered: “Let people know that you are on their side. That you are behind them and you are supportive. I do care that a patient or staff person is able to stand up for himself or herself. When we motivate others we just don’t look at a person. We look at a person and at their environment.” This perspective shows several of the principles of symphonic leadership, and is an example of playing from the soul: the ability to shape situations in ways that align collective action with the protection and advancement of self-interest.


Eric Wilson, the co-chair of Vassar’s African American Alumnae/i organization, gave one more clue about Dr. Christmas’s leadership style with this description: “Dr. Christmas was as regular as they came. Humble, personable, so totally lacking in pretension as to be considered old-school cool, and beyond brilliant.” This hints at a third characteristic of symphonic leaders, moving the crowd: a depth of social grace where social interactions leave people wanting more.

At Symphonic Strategies, we’re always on the lookout for new examples of symphonic leaders to study and share with others. Women’s History Month is a wonderful opportunity to highlight and celebrate great women leaders, but be sure you’re aware of the great leaders around you every day.

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Post by: Symphonic Strategies
Jan 9

Escaping Our Emotional Bunkers